Quantcast
Odds of a Kanye West Presidency: 90% - Dilbert Blog

Odds of a Kanye West Presidency: 90%

This morning I was catching up on some drawing while watching a rebroadcast of the VMAs (Video Music Awards). I was vaguely aware that Kanye West had given some sort of overlong, rambling speech and this was a chance to score it for you on the Master Wizard linguistic scale.

I have very bad news for all of you Kanye haters. 

He’s the real deal. 

If you are following my Trump Persuasion Series in this blog, you know I like to make predictions through what I call the Master Wizard Filter. This hypothesis says that at any point in time there are a small number of linguistic geniuses that shape human history, and they are generally hiding in plain sight. 

The linguistic wizards – should such hypothetical creatures exist – use the science of persuasion to shape opinions of those around them and sometimes the public at large. (In the old days it was less about science, obviously, and probably more about trying different things, observing what worked, and maybe sharing methods.)

My opinion as a trained hypnotist is that if such linguistic wizards exist, Kanye West is already near the top of that list. I watched his “overlong, rambling” speech for persuasion technique and find it to be a masterpiece. Literally. It might be his finest work, and I’m saying that as a fan of his music. The “If I had a daughter” part was pure open-ended linguistic genius. And it set the chess board for his run to the White House. You probably doubt he has real intentions to run for president in 2020.

It is his intention. 

No doubt about it. 

There was too much engineering in that speech to suggest any other motive.

Did you hate Kanye for his awkward and inappropriate act of idiocy with Taylor Swift a few years ago? You probably did have a strong negative reaction. Did you hate him for being an egomaniac at the VMAs this year? If you watched it, you probably did.

You probably think Kanye has a disgustingly big ego, a blinding ambition, and often he is TOO honest. Just shut up already, Kanye!

I just described Donald Trump’s personality and lifetime game plan. Kanye West is on the same glide path. It looks like this:

Success…success…success…marry a publicity magnet…big ego…publicity stunts and loud mouth attract attention…a genius-level linguistic skill disguised in simple language of the people…and starting young for the presidency.

Will Kanye win the presidency in 2020? Doubtful, but he will get more famous. 

Will Kanye win the presidency in 2024? Doubtful, but he will get more famous. 

Will Kanye win the presidency in 2028? Doubtful, but he will get more famous. 

How about 2032? 

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you President West.

I could be wrong. Remember, this blog is for entertainment. Any enlightenment is accidental. I promised I would give you some predictions based on the Master Wizard Hypothesis, and this is one of them. (I will try to keep most predictions to shorter terms.)

And yes, I’m serious. Kanye West has the skills. You are already underestimating him. That’s why it will work. He will exceed expectations while competing against people who can only meet or disappoint. And he will make you believe he is the only honest, caring person in the race.

His chess board doesn’t look bad at all. And if he wins, the media will report that 2032 was one of those years the public just needed an “outsider.”

In Top Tech Blog, see the future of tomorrow today, unless you read it a day late, in which case some of the news will be yesterday’s vision of a future tomorrow that you are reading that day. Or you could just wait for the future and be surprised by the whole thing. That works too.

Find the common thread on this best seller list. Once you see it, you can’t unsee it.

Mine is available here.